Funniest Interview ...

I would say that I have took one of the most funniest interviews that I have ever taken in my life today. I was just LMAO after coming out of the interview. This one I took for a 4 year experienced candidate. This is for the post of an Senior Engineer and we were looking out for some one who is a master of all trade and jack of none, and to be honest that is the kind of profile I was looking for. I just could not control my laughter during the interview and at the same time I am shocked to see such resources exists in this industry. I know experience shapes a man, but in this case it has not done any change. That candidate's english was the reason for humour and I am putting it as raw as possible so that my readers can also enjoy. Non-IT folks, kindly excuse, coz most of the terms you may not be able to appreicate ...

Hi, I am Satish who is working as the Performance Architect here and I am the one who is going to hadle the technical session for you. So before we go into detailed discussion, can you just brief about yourself and what kind of role you play on a day to day basis with your current company, so that I can understand your profile a bit more.

Oh ya, I am and basically I am from Hyderabad and my house and family and wife and children's are there everywhere and I basically worked in this company for the job of Techincal Lead for the last 2 years and I work very closely with the teams and see the job and basically help all of them in the work.

It took me close to 2 minutes to decipher what he was trying to say and I asked within myself "என்ன வெச்சு காமிடி கீமிடி பண்ணலையே". I seriously could not understand what techincal task he was doing, but I still have to talk to him for another 55 minutes, and I have already rejected him after this introduction, because, I am a person who stress a lot on communication.

So can you explain me what kind of technical activities you perform with the team and what exactly is the definition of your "Techincal Lead" designation ?

Basically the problems in the our job is always there (he laughs, god knows why) and I am solved the issues which are facing the team by giving suggestions and recommendations for all the problems.

Will the be on Operating Systems or Databases or App Servers ?

That problems we dont have and I could not remind the problems that we used to get here, ya I am solving the problems in the team

By this time I have gone mad and I am about to burst out in laughter, but that guy was just sitting opposite to me and hence I controlled myself. I then continued ...

How would you rate yourself in LoadRunner in the point scale of 1 to 10 ?

LoadRunner versions you are asking ? I worked in all LoadRunners

I just could not stop the grin that escaped my lips and re-iterated the question.

10 (I am surprised by this reply)

Ok have you ever created scenarios in LoadRunner and can you tell me what are the types of scenarios we have in LoadRunner ?

Basically the LoadRunner is the tool that I using for the all the testings that we have did, all the scenarios I could not remember, it is already a long time I worked in the LoadRunner (again laughs)

WTF ? He has not worked on LoadRunner, but he is giving himself 10 ?? I decided not to ask him any further questions on LoadRunner

So are you an end user in Windows or are you an expert ?

Windows I can say I used daily and I will get expert for few more times this month

Satish head started to spin and I was saying to myself "என்ன கேட்டாலும் கொழப்பரானே, அவனா நீ ?"

So can you tell me what is a TCP/IP Chimney on a Win2K3 Server ?

He was quite for almost 4 minutes and I was going over his CV, after brief 4 minute silence, he said - "Can you repeat the question ?"

So can you tell me what is a TCP/IP Chimney on a Win2K3 Server ?

Again he went into mute and this time I dont have the patience to wait for him, so I started my next question, but ...

Can you repeate the question ? (Satish was going restless and I again said to myself - "ஏன் டா ? ஏன் ?? ஏன் என்னயவே குறி வெச்சு வரீங்க ?"

I said, that's ok, we can move on ...

No No I had the answer, but I wanted to re-ask the question once again - "ஆஹா ... கிளம்பிட்டாங்கயா .... கிளம்பிட்டாங்கயா"

He finally said - "Sorry I dont know"

I was like "இப்பவே கண்ண கட்டுதே"

So do you have any specific reason to look out for a change ? (What else I can ask to a guy who is technically 0 ?)

I had some personal problems in the native and I was not going home regularly, my wife getting angry that I am always office till night, so I wanted her to return to me in Bangalore so that I can work only little in the day time and be with home early

Is there any other reason other than your personal reason ?

Basically, the company I am working now cannot run next month, the clients are closing the company also managers are not good, I cannot worked the office never, so I wanted to change"

Then I asked, do you have any questions for me ?

Ya, basically, Misys company is world company or only the India company ? because the name says India. Pvt. Ltd that is what I am asked.

ஆண்டவா உனக்கு என் மேல கருணையே இல்லையா ? ஏன் எனக்கு மட்டும் இப்படி மாட்டுது ?

Ya we are a global company and we have offices across the globe.

Will I be the chance to go to the foreign ?

இப்படியே பேசின, நீ வீட்டுக்கே போக மாட்ட நாயே ...

No there wont be any onsite opportunities and I thank you for your time and I will upate my HR with my feedback, its been a pressure (pleasure) talking to you.

Phew, I seriously pitty that guy, but I can just offer my pity but not a job